“i ain’t gonna have no money to buy my son the G.I. joe with the kung-fu grip!”

is billy ray valentine onto something?

the swine flu hysteria (yes, hysteria because people are stupid and think every little thing is an epidemic) has caused pork belly prices to spiral downwards in the financial markets. russia and china, big importers of american meat products, have both banned pork imports from the u.s. i am sure the e.u. isn’t far behind since their officials suggested their citizens avoid nonessential trips to the u.s. or mexico.

i don’t dig on swine but i am very concerned: will bacon aficionados stop eating their favorite food? i can see the eye roll and hear the “ridiculous” miles away…

Published in: on April 27, 2009 at 1:50 pm  Comments (2)  

how to properly cut a watermelon

watermelon

watermelon

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Published in: on April 21, 2009 at 10:56 pm  Comments (2)  

kashmir and pakistan: part three

my asia sojourn was originally intended to be a relief and travel trip built almost entirely around kashmir. of course, things didn’t happen quite as planned. we ended up spending only three days of my 12-day trip in kashmir. was i disappointed? yes. was i going to complain to my parents about staying longer in kashmir when they were both still very ill from their mideast trip? no.

on the flip side, my father encouraged me to visit the mughal sites in and around lahore, saying that there could be much to write about there. lahore has a rich and colorful history and was once the jewel of the punjab during mughal and british rule in india. rudyard kipling wrote many a verse about his love of the city. emperor shah jahan, best known as the architect of the taj mahal in agra, loved lahore so much that he spent many summer months in the area. he even created the lovely shalimar gardens, with its more than 400 fountains, summer baths and pavilions, as a retreat for the royal family. now, it’s a UNESCO heritage site, although you’d wouldn’t know that if you saw its current state.

shalimar gardens

shalimar gardens

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i hadn’t visited the gardens since i was a kid. i remembered it being very green, with many poplar, peach and mango trees and flowers blooming all around. i was saddened to see that my memory hadn’t served me well. the fountains were silent. the landscaping, some of it patchy, some of it green, needed improvement although the people who i saw working the grounds when i visited were trying their best with the meager budget they had been given. one of the workers told us stories about elephant processions through the gardens during mughal days. the elephants are long gone and much of the fretwork needs to be restored. my mother and i spent half our visit to the gardens picking up discarded candy bar wrappers and water bottles. one beggar chased me down to make me stop but i told her this is the only world we had and we better band together to keep it beautiful.
shalimar fountains

part of the gardens
flowers in bloom
more fountains
gardens

this is a historical site and should be treated with much care. but considering pakistan is going through a dire financial and civil crisis and many people are poor, i guess the government doesn’t see the need in restoring the beauty of the gardens. it’s a shame because long after we’re gone, the remains of our civilization will still be around…

Published in: on April 20, 2009 at 7:34 am  Comments (2)  

kashmir and pakistan: part two

our car didn’t careen over the cliff but i definitely thought it would at several points during our trip. while the road was well developed and had guard rails along its entire length, cars would pass us at blind spots as other cars were coming down the mountain in the opposite direction. i didn’t want to die that way and to be the cause of my parents’ demise when it was my idea to go to kashmir.

we made it to azad jammu and kashmir in record time. breathtaking couldn’t accurately describe the views. when my father asked me what i thought about kashmir, i said, “it looks like the norwegian fjords and the south island of new zealand.”

the hindu kush
the valley
on the road to azad jammu and kashmir
the neelum river
another view of kashmir

we checked into the mess hall in muzzafarabad. my cousin rabia’s husband is a general in the army. my father thinks he will soon become commander and chief of the pakistani armed forces because of his meteoric rise up the chain of command. he’s well liked and well respected among army brass. and it’s only through his connections that we were able to stay in such secure accommodations. azad jammu and kashmir has its fair share of lodgings, from hostels to small boutique hotels but the mess hall has the most incredible views of the mountains and the valleys below. plus, we had our own private servant and chef. the pathan servant said the chef would make us anything we wanted. i almost asked for monkey brains and camel meat as a lark but the poor guy already looked so downtrodden, i didn’t have the heart to add to his misery.

the general had arranged for me to meet with dr. munir, the head of the geology department at the local university. dr. munir was kind enough to take my father and myself around muzzafarabad, pointing out where the 2005 earthquake did the most damage and how so much still needed to be done even four years later. at 7.6 on the richter scale, the quake’s epicenter was muzzafarabad but the shocks could be felt as far away as lahore. dr. munir said that relief efforts were slow but continuing. turkey had immediately sent envoys to help and the united nations wasn’t far behind. saudi arabia was also helpful. i would like to think that the saudis did it out of a sense of helping their muslim brethren but i think it has more to do with spreading wahhabism to non-arab countries. sickening.

we met an old woman on one of the streets who was walking with a severe limp. i asked her what had happened and if she needed help. she explained that part of her home had fallen on her and when she was rescued from the rubble, she was immediately taken to the local hospital but since others’ injuries were life threatening, she had had to wait for medical attention. when they set her leg, it was too late and it healed incorrectly. her face was etched in pain but she still wore a smile. she thanked my father and me for coming to muzzafarabad to see the damage and to try to help. i wanted to cry.

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earthquake devastation
earthquake damage
more earthquake damage
more damage
another damaged building

thousands of people had lost their homes and some even lost their entire families. one of the schools had crumbled and more than 35 children had perished. many families were living in tents or temporary UN-sanctioned shelters. dr. munir said that kashmir’s fault line is one of the deepest in the world and another powerful quake is around the corner. “why don’t people move to safer ground,” i asked? dr. munir said, “they are kashmiris. their families have lived here for centuries. where else would they go?” he had a point.

tent housing
another tent shelter

as we left the city, several kashmiri children saw my camera and asked me to take photos of them. they were naturally inquisitive as to who i was. i told them my name and that i was american but pakistani born and that i was there to help. they smiled, posed for pics and gasped in awe at the beauty of hawaii (i still had my pics from that trip on my camera).

the cutest boy in kashmir
another cute kashmiri boy
triple threat of kashmir cuteness

if you want to help the relief efforts in kashmir or anywhere else for that matter, contact unicef at http://www.unicef.org/ or the united nations high commission for refugees at http://www.unhcr.org/cgi-bin/texis/vtx/home

Published in: on April 14, 2009 at 9:03 pm  Leave a Comment  

kashmir and pakistan: part one

after spending 24 hours traveling yesterday and getting no sleep on the plane due to a stomach ailment, i am up bright and early on tuesday to post about part of my kashmir and pakistan trip.

i haven’t been to the region since i was kid. the last time i visited, that bastard dictator, zia ul-haq, was president. he has much to answer for the current situation in pakistan and afghanistan. a general under zulfikar ali bhutto, benazir’s beloved father, haq (who incidentally shares a last name with my mother’s side of the family but is not a relation) overthrew bhutto, had him summarily executed and took control of the country for more than 11 years. during that time, he helped a nation that was progressing, albeit slowly, get mired in the heartbreaking afghan-soviet conflict, brought about the rise of the ISI, pakistan’s answer to the CIA, and aided the birth of taliban-like groups in both afghanistan and pakistan. these things have contributed to so much of the strife in afghanistan and pakistan. may he rot in hell.

haq also spent millions funding the kashmiri conflict. i am a pakistani-born afghan but i don’t think india or pakistan should have control of the region. while it was intended to be dispensed to pakistan after the partition of 1947 because of its predominantly muslim population, it’s been more than 50 years since then and the two nuclear powers can’t seem to come to a compromise. i have always believed that kashmir is for the kashmiris and never more so than now.

i didn’t know how my recent trip to azad jammu and kashmir would pan out. while i expected natural beauty—from waterfalls to what the norwegians call fjords to majestic peaks—and wonderful, hopeful people, what i didn’t expect was a tortuous four-hour drive from islamabad that had me clinging to my seat as the hired driver, naseem khan, traversed his way up the mountain on a two-lane road littered with more than a dozen landslides.

landslides in azad jammu and kashmir
cleaning up a landslide

was i going to be a landslide victim? stay tuned to find out…

Published in: on April 14, 2009 at 6:36 am  Leave a Comment  

back from kashmir

back from kashmir. crazy trip that didn’t quite go according to plan. it was fulfilling nonetheless. will post about it later today and tomorrow. in the meantime, if you are anxious for some durrani copy, as i know so many of you are, check out my cannes article here. i think it turned out pretty well considering i finished it in an hour after spending a whirlwind three days in the city.

Published in: on April 14, 2009 at 6:01 am  Leave a Comment